Every Writer Struggles - Even Dean Koontz

I remember my sister-in-law's pep talk like it was yesterday, (oh wait, it was yesterday - only yesterday's was pep talk number two zillion!) Anyway, the FIRST pep talk was about believing in myself and my writing; that I had to at least try to get my book published. I remember paying particular attention to her words, despite the fact that they weren't really sinking in - my sister-in-law is much more confident than I am and I was just trying to be polite and listen.  In the back of my head doubt began to creep in and soon it was snuggled up there with a knitted afghan, refusing to leave.  Looking back now I am certain she could see the doubt through my eyes because she left me with an example.  Dean Koontz.  

I remember her telling me about an interview he did in which he talked about his wife offering to support him while he tried to get published.  (I'm thinking about getting hold of Mrs. Koontz and asking her to support me while I try, but for some reason I don't think my journey will have as much clout!) I remember thinking how great it was that he had a wife who believed in him enough to offer the time to follow his dreams.  I am pretty sure my sister-in-law saw where my doubt-filled mind was headed, so she, ever-so carefully, yet insistently, told me that I needed to give myself a specific amount of time and during that time frame I was NOT aloud to give up! And, thus far, I have heeded her advice!

Today, as I realized I am overwhelmed with work, family and even blogging, I remembered her talk, and I remembered Dean Koontz.  I honestly think that someone was looking out for me today - someone let me remember her talk and Dean's story in order to help me see that even the world's top selling authors struggle and I am not alone (or crazy).

I know that Erika and I spend most of our time blogging about not giving up and believing in yourself (and believe me, it's mostly to serve as a reminder for ourselves) but today I thought it would be appropriate to give you an example of someone else who struggled(es) with rejection and self-doubt.

It's hard to believe that someone who has sold more than 400 million books in 38 language and who has been #1 on the NY Times Best Sellers List 13 times, ever suffered from self-doubt.  But he did.



On Dean's website there are several questions about rejection and I recommend you read them here: Dean Koontz on Rejection
But in case you don't have time, here are my favorite parts.

As a young writer, did you encounter rejection?–Allison, Pennsylvania

I sold the first short story I wrote. Then I received over 75 rejections before making another sale. My first four novels were never published. Later, after I’d been selling genre fiction routinely, I wrote a mainstream novel, ALL OTHER MEN. Editors sent me enthusiastic letters about it, said they loved it, but turned it down because they felt it was too disturbing and too avant garde to be commercial.

You had an agent in your early years tell you that you'd never be a best-selling writer. Did that discourage you or make you more determined to succeed

I have more self-doubt than any writer I’ve ever known. That is one reason I revise every page to the point of absurdity! The positive aspect of self-doubt – if you can channel it into useful activity instead of being paralyzed by it – is that by the time you reach the end of a novel, you know precisely why you made every decision in the narrative, the multiple purposes of every metaphor and image. Having been your own hardest critic you still have dreams but not illusions.

So I figure if Dean Koontz "has more self-doubt than any writer I've ever known" (obviously he hasn't met me!), then I am in good company, the kind of company that keeps you going - and definitely keeps you from giving up!